Said my goodbyes to Malaysia. Jalan Ampang and Bangsar will be soon forgotten, along with Penang, Taman Malawati, the Kelana Jaya line, KL central, Bukit Bintang and many other euphonic names that had been a part of my life for so many months. The country that opened its arms to me is now thousands of miles away. The sun that beat down on me will now be sorely missed. It doesn't rain like it used to, the drops of rain have shrivelled in size and I haven't heard the thunder in months. The termites won't knaw at my cupboard, the fungus won't grow on my damp clothes, and the taxi drivers won't nod and say "ok la!"
My office was on the 39th floor but it was dwarfed by the KLCC that stood next to it. Everytime I looked out my windows the towers stared down at me like a big bully. The annoying presence of the KLCC (Petronas towers) will also be missed. The smelly food courts will be missed, and the thousand shopping malls will be missed. The beautiful Penang beaches will be missed. My lovely Malaysian friends, who adopted me as their own will be missed.
Last night I dreamt that the city had left me behind and moved away. I opened my door and found that the city was gone. Whoosh! Not a soul in sight. That's what happens when you leave your cities behind. They begin to leave you too.
In between the linesI scribbled roughly into my notebook,
Dark days daubed with charcoal,
The sun can be an underclerk,
In a worn out gray over coat.
On such days my alphabets,
Have a language of their own.
The realm of horizontal lines,
Here is a place for the reasonable mind,
To twist and turn every time,
To the whistle of a toy train,
Meandering to a certainty,
Through tunnels of circumstance,
And hills and vales of happenstance,
To the finality of a shape,
Precluding the possibility of millions,
And millions of other shapes.
Consummation is a warm handshake,
And a cloying smile,
That can be brushed aside,
In all its levity,
Nudged outside just as,
The million others that clamored,
For a chance at the limelight.
